A little Education on Food Allergies

I am the mother to four children, three sons and one daughter. My daughter is special in more ways than one. She is the only daughter, which will likely never change. She is a proud ‘princess’. She is fierce and determined. She is smart and doesn’t hide it. She is flighty and whimsical. She is also a special needs child.

Having a child with special needs is not something most of us would expect. Special needs can cover a variety of disabilities and conditions, like being mentally delayed, having autism, or needing a wheelchair. Some would even consider those who have chronic medical conditions, such as asthma or diabetes, to be a special need. All of these are correct. However, there is a special need that most people don’t seem to think is a special need.

Food Allergies.

Merriam-Webster dictionary defines Special Needs as 'any of various difficulties (such as a physical, emotional, behavioral, or learning disability or impairment) that causes an individual to require additional or specialized services or accommodations (such as in education or recreation)'. Someone with food allergies requires accommodations in some way, whether it be by needing an epi-pen on them or having to sit at a separate table at school- it falls under a special need.

It is estimated that as many as 15 million people have food allergies in the States alone. 1 in 13 children have food allergies. If the average class size is 24-30 children, that means there could be two children per classroom that have some type of food allergy. An allergic reaction happens, on average, every three minutes- resulting in 200,000 Emergency room visits per year. Children, 18 and under, account for approximately 300,000 out-patient doctors’ visits every year.

{https://www.foodallergy.org/facts-and-stats}

Those with food allergies can die. This isn’t a hypothetical situation- it has happened. A teenager at a summer camp had a treat, a treat that was supposed to be peanut-free- she died. A man had a piece of pizza, not knowing an egg-wash had been added to the crust- he died. A college student was on her first day of school when she went to get food from the cafeteria, she got something she assumed was safe- she died. Teenagers and young adults as often at the highest risk of having a fatal reaction.

So, what do we, the parents of those who have food allergies, do? Often, we live in terror- sometimes it shows, sometimes it doesn’t. We know those peanut butter crackers that most kids love are a death sentence. We know a glass of milk could make our baby’s skin bubble and her tongue swell. We know that shellfish will make our son’s throat squeeze until he can’t breathe.

Each parent deals with it differently. Some avoid parties, some homeschool, some pretend like it’s not a real issue. I used to panic at the very thought of cross-contamination. I would be fierce and bear-like when someone would offer my child something she was allergic to. Eventually I realized this wasn’t doing anything except scaring my children, especially my daughter, and it did nothing to educate other people.

So many assume that parents who have food-allergic children are ‘helicopter parents’. I used to be one, I fully admit it. When you watch your only daughter come close to dying, it tends to make you protective. A woman, another mother, decided I must be a helicopter parent when my daughter was five-years-old. It was a school party and I wasn’t there. My little girl nearly died because of this mother’s ignorance.

Ignorance may be a harsh word, but I believe it is accurate. According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary ignorance is defined as ‘destitute of knowledge or education; lacking knowledge or comprehension of thing specified’. She was ignorant of just how dangerous food allergies could be. I realized that it was my job, as a food-allergy parent, to educate other people about this particular special need. After that it would be up to other people to accept this knowledge or to continue to remain ignorant.

I homeschool my children now. They will attend a regular middle and high school, when I believe my daughter is able to self-advocate better (she is only seven right now). However, I have grown in how I interact with people in regards to her allergies. My daughter goes to parties- I check the food and let her know what she can have. I also offer to bring items for her so the person hosting doesn’t feel the added pressure to make something special. If someone offers my kids a snack, I first ask what is in it than either accept or decline. Most people will ask me why I asked, and I take it as an opportunity to tell people about my daughter’s food allergies as well as about food allergies in general. It had come as a shock to many people that food allergies are considered a special need.

Another shock that most people find out is that food allergies doesn’t make a child unhealthy. I have had people say to me ‘well, my child is perfectly healthy!’. Having a food allergy doesn’t take away from a child’s health unless they are exposed to the thing they are allergic to. My daughter is perfectly healthy with no other issues. We are lucky in that regard, because children with food allergies are 2-4 times more likely to develop asthma or seasonal allergies then children who do not have food allergies.

So, a few things to remember when it comes to children with food allergies- Never take offence when a parent turns down a snack (please don’t say ‘a little won’t hurt’, because for many kids a little will kill), just because a child had food allergies does not mean that child is unhealthy, be understanding, and ask questions. And, though it is invisible, having a food allergy does mean that person has a special need.

Lola Grace Stevens